Take a closer look at what you're resisting
Resistance gets in the way of things we want. We can have an ambitious, interesting goal, feel super motivated and have access to all the resources we need....and still not achieve that goal. Because resistance stops us taking the action needed to achieve our goals, leaving us feeling like we’ve hit a brick wall.
Whilst it's tempting to call out other reasons (or *cough* excuses) why we haven't done the things we said we wanted to do, a big factor in our success or failure is our ability to move beyond resistance. You know when you block out time in your calendar for a certain activity and then don't do it? Instead, you work on some e-mails or pick a different task instead? That's what I'm talking about.
You had a plan to do something creative, or give yourself space to think and plan, or to get a paper written, but instead you resist the task and fill your time with something else. Today I want to share an idea discussed by Steven Pressfield in War of Art, that is a positive re-frame on how resistance shows up.
Whilst resistance can be a frustrating part of the process towards achieving our goals, it can also be helpful. Why? Because in Steven's words "resistance will always point to true North". If you're resisting something, it's a big flashing neon sign that it's important to you. Because why bother resisting something we don't really care about? That we aren't really invested in?
Resistance mainly shows up when we have an opportunity to better ourselves. This means you can use resistance as a compass - it will direct you towards what you really want.
Resisting going for a new role?
Resisting exercise?
Resisting picking up the book you're part way through?
Resisting that difficult conversation with your boss?
Take a look at that. What if your resistance is showing you that this action is exactly what's needed?
Personally, for the last few weeks I've been resisting commenting on race. It's felt an important conversation and action to be part of, but I resisted with thoughts like 'who am I to talk about race?’ I moved through this and I'm grateful that this new perspective on resistance could help me and I hope it's a useful tool to help you identify what's important to you.
P.S. Resistance is a clue that we're on to something good. This perspective shift can help you crack it.
P.P.S. There's 2 ways you can currently work with me: 1) a 2 hour breakthrough NLP session or 2) a 4 session coaching programme over 2 months. All phone based. When you're ready, hit reply and we'll agree which approach best serves your goal.
