You're Not Scared..... You're Excited
You can sense heat rising in your cheeks, you feel a sudden jolt race through you, your palms start to sweat, your breathing quickens, you feel jittery.
What emotion are you feeling in this moment?
Is it a jolt of fear? Or is it a jolt of excitement?
Interestingly, our physiological responses to fear and excitement are very similar. The way our brains tell them apart is using the broader context e.g. are you about to be eaten by a lion? Yes? That's fear then.
Furthermore, our primal fear response means the message to our brain is the same whether you're facing down a hungry lion, or facing down an angry boss. Our brains are just wired to sense a threat and react to keep us safe.
The point about this that has caught my interest, is that if our brains need context in order to work out whether to be scared or excited, we have the ability to influence how we feel.
Let's talk through an example so you can see what I mean. You're about to give a presentation to 200 people at your office offsite. In the hour beforehand, you feel the symptoms - your palms sweat, your heart clenches.
PAUSE
You now get to interpret how you feel. If your brain is looking for an explanation of why you feel this way, give it one. Rather than thinking I'm terrified, how did I end up here, I should never have agreed to this, would it be career suicide if I run now...etc etc...try telling your brain something else.
Tell your brain you are EXCITED. Your heart is racing, your palms sweating, because excitement is coursing through your veins. You're pumped. You enjoy sharing your experience with others, your presentation will help people, you'll feel proud of yourself afterwards. All reasons to feel excited.
And your brain will believe you.
It will rationally accept that you're excited about getting out there. This means there is no threat to your safety. And your physiological response will calm down. It won't go away - but you'll feel more in control.
This is an idea I came across in Mel Robbins book 'The 5 Second Rule', which I mentioned I had read last week. She uses the example of fear of flying - when she felt the fear, she would picture excitedly greeting her friends/ family on landing and convince herself this was what she was feeling (using a mix of other techniques too).
Think about how to use this insight in a business context. Other than presentations, what could also be scary, yet exciting?
- introducing yourself to the CEO
- sharing an idea in a room of influential colleagues (more on this next week)
- hitting send on a pitch document to a client
- your first day in a new role.
Yes it's absolutely normal to feel some fear in business situations. But give some thought to how powerful you could be if you turn fear to excitement. And use excitement to drive you forward.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.
P.S. I have two 1-1 coaching spots opening up in October. If you're feeling undervalued in your current role or unsure of your next career step, drop me an e-mail and apply for a complimentary coaching session to see where I can support you.
